Don’t Let the Children Get in the Way!

Everyone loves babies, right? They are so adorable with their little features, you just want to cuddle them for as long as they’ll let you. What a lot of people don’t realise though, is the whirlwind of change that comes with these cute little babies. From sleep patterns to eating times, having a baby will always have a huge impact on the life of their parents.

Most parents are able to ride the tide and get back on their feet quickly however, some don’t manage as well as others.  The children become the centre of their universe and the couple no longer have time for each other. This can drive a wedge between the couple with a lot of damage done before they realise what has happened.

It struck me a few days ago how easy it is for us to fall into a similar trap in our walk with God. Sometimes, we “let the children get in the way”. What do I mean by children? In Christianity, “children” can be likened to the fruits of our relationship with God. This could be blessings like houses and cars, assignments like ministry and jobs or achievements like awards or promotions.

For the purpose of this post, I would like to focus more on our God-given assignments or destiny projects. We all have God-given roles to play in establishing His kingdom on earth. Yes, each one of us has a divine purpose that must enthrone God’s dominion and influence in every sphere of the world.

Your life matters and God has a specific purpose and plan for putting you on earth.

“For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.”

Ephesians 2:10 [NKJV]

I love the translation below,

“We have become His poetry, a re-created people that will fulfil the destiny He has given each of us, for we are joined to Jesus, the Anointed One. Even before we were born, God planned in advance our destiny and the good works we would do to fulfil it!”

Ephesians 2:10 [TPT]

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Jeremiah 29:11 [NIV]

Some people are called to serve the body of Christ as apostles, prophets, pastors and teachers. Others are called to minister in areas like government/politics, media, family, health, entertainment, education and the list goes on. We have that responsibility to partner with Holy Spirit to search out the plan and purposes of God for us and walk according to them. As we walk with Him, He start to point us in the direction of the assignments and plans He has for us and by His grace and wisdom we begin to birth them through various projects, innovations and witty inventions.

This is great. This is wonderful. However, things can get quite blurry. This is why I gave the illustration of raising of children impacting on the relationship between a husband and wife. Ideally, none of them should suffer for the other but they sometimes do.

It can be quite difficult to tell when you start drifting into the zone of chasing your divine assignment, purpose or calling at the cost of your relationship with God. I don’t know if you have been there before, but I have. All of sudden you may find that you begin to prioritize your assignment, project or calling above the God who has called you. The same way a mother may find that between caring for her children and perhaps working a full-time job, she no longer has time to be a wife to her husband. She may also find that the only reason she talks to her husband is that of things that concern the children. So also, it could get to a point where the primary motivation for communing with God is your ministry and not His person.

What do I mean? For example, with this blog, there have been seasons when I have found myself reading my bible with the intention of getting some juicy revelation to share not because I really wanted to spend time with God.

We see Jesus reprimanding the church of Ephesus for this same thing in the book of Revelation. He said,

I know all that you’ve done for me—you have worked hard and persevered…  But I have this against you: you have abandoned the passionate love you had for me at the beginning.”

Revelation 2:2-4 [TPT]

I love using this example because it highlights the constant tug of war that we all have to face as Christians. Finding the balance between serving God and preserving a passionate and intimate relationship with Him. I like to call it the Mary – Martha struggle.

To round off, I want to highlight two examples of people in the bible who had this struggle and examine how they dealt with it.

The first person is Saul who God anointed the first king of Israel. He had an assignment to leads God’s own people, but he became too obsessed and attached to it.  It seemed as though, he never tried to know the God that had called him. Eventually, he burnt-out and it cost him his kingship because he feared the people he was called to serve more than the God who called him. (1 Samuel 28:16-19)

The second person is David who was the next king after Saul. A humble shepherd boy who God raised to be king. One of the thing that strikes me most about David is how he didn’t mind looking weak or silly to display his love for God. Yes, he was king, but he never forgot the God who made him king. He never placed the people above God. The people were important, but God was much more important to him.

He understood this. His relationship with God came first, then everything else. This understanding made him one of the best kings Israel ever had.

As Christians, there are so many things to watch for and this is one of them. We must constantly check that God remains number one and nothing else takes His place. Always remember, the Giver must always come before the gifts and never let the assignment become more important than the sender.

Lord I thank you for the person reading this post. I thank you for the grace and calling upon their life. I thank you for the amazing destiny that you have planned for them. Lord, I pray that You will grant them the grace to put you first in all things. I pray that You will give them the wisdom to serve You and advance Your kingdom without compromising their relationship with you. Lord, I pray for courage and strength to forge ahead in the path of destiny you have called them to. Finally, I pray for humility of the Spirit to be completely aligned to your perfect will for them, fully pleasing You. Thank you, Abba. This is I pray, in Jesus name. Amen.

God bless you. Thank you for reading. Please drop your comment below and do share this post with a friend if it has blessed you.

Written by: Ayowade Adeleye.

8 thoughts on “Don’t Let the Children Get in the Way!

  1. This is so true and encouraging that I am not the only one who is in this situation. It has pointed me in the direction I should now go. Thank you so much for sharing!


  2. Hey Pastor! Thanks for sharing such a powerful insight. I’m just thinking; have you got any ideas on practical ways to achieve this balance.


    1. Thank you for reading, Jay.

      I’ve been thinking about the question and the one things that comes to mind is regular spiritual MOT.

      We know our goal, we know that we want God to always come first in our lives. Then what we need to do is have a regular time when we sit down with the Holy Spirit and honestly check our hearts. I think it would make a huge difference if we had that time where we just pause and ask ourselves some intentional questions, giving back honest answers. It would make a difference in so many other areas of our lives. Most people advice that you do this once year, I think it’s profitable if we do it as often as we can.

      In addition to our spiritual growth and walk with God, we can also use the time to review our progress with our assignment, finances, relationship.

      As we review these areas, the holy spirit will begin to minister to us about areas that need more work.

      That’s one practical way that I can think off. I hope this helps?


  3. Very true and what an insightful article. No one is perfect and we all need the Grace of God to serve Him truly and with all our heart.


  4. Thank you!!, I so needed this reminder. It’s really not easy but I notice I don’t fall short when I let the Holy Spirit help me.


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